You can have all of the emotional intelligence in the world; your human intellectual self will very rarely let you experience the very human condition of death without going through all the stages of grief and loss. The old question of which is worse, knowing when your loved one is going to die or having it happen suddenly, is one that will perhaps never get answered sufficiently. However, knowing when it’s time to prepare for the last great journey comes with complications.
The great adventure of life surrenders to the mystery that only exists for the traveler about to make this final crossing. The people left behind must deal with the most vicious blow of all – the finality of this existence.
There is no manual, guide, and a one-size-fits-all approach to dealing with a loved one’s terminal illness, but we’re going to try to help you make a softer landing space for you and everyone else left behind.
“Death is the easy part; the hard part is living and knowing you could be so much more than you’re willing to be.” – Robert M. Drake, American author.
Prepare For The Last Great Journey
Getting Over the Initial Shock of Finding Out
There is no easy way to hear the news that someone you love dearly will die. However, with that finality comes an unexpected source of closure that is often not possible when family members are taken suddenly by accident or illness. Even so, you’re still going to share the full range of human emotions during this period. The best advice you can get is to make one decision at a time and make it the one decision you can make at that time.
If you’re a parent preparing to lose a parent, remember that your children will be taking clues from you about how they should behave and what is appropriate. The more honest you are – the more they will be.
There is no easy way to navigate this period with your loved one, and you’ll be needing some advice from an expert, like your local hospice, for example.
Staying Calm But Still In Tune With Your Emotions
No one is born with this knowledge. It comes with experience that only life can teach, but you must learn to deal with pressure. You and those around you are about to experience one of the most tragic human experiences. You’re into the spirituality of it all, and you’re still allowed to be intrinsically and beautifully human.
One thing is certain, you cannot do this on your own, and you don’t have to. Consider counseling for your terminally ill loved one and your family as a way to understand what’s happening around you. Feel what you’re feeling and offer no apologies for it, but steer conversations towards the good times. The good times offer reassurances that everyone is ultimately going to be ok because the truth is – you will.
The Last Great Journey
Accepting and dealing with the last great journey will come with a range of emotions. Prepare for the quick changes and the unexpected emotions. Most of all, stay positive and focus on the good times.
